Wicked Enraptures
by Ifuonlyknewgrl
Summary: “I’m sorry I don’t want to do this Hermione…” he whispered, his eyes flickering with reluctance. Hermione gave him a twisted look of surprise.“Did you just call me—?” DMHG. Mystery&Romance. Strong M! Violence in future chapters.
1. Rock A Bye Baby

**Wicked Enraptures **

**Parings:** Central HG/DM, HP/?, RW/Implied HG.

**Ratings: **R—some times it will border NC-17. Don't go running to the Admins; I'll dilute some of it out.

**Summary:** There's something foul about her when placed in a mindset filled with dingy thoughts, biting retorts and secrets that would make the devil himself weep. Hermione Granger knew this, and it's why she tried so hard to hide it from her parents and most of all from her friends, but obviously not hard enough.

**Author's Note: **A plot bunny that has bitten me, transmitting rabies. Oi! Here it is.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it, and if I did, certain characters would be shagging already.

* * *

**Prologue: **Rock-a-bye Baby

_In the treetop  
when the wind blows, the cradle will rock  
when the bough breaks; the cradle will fall  
and down will come baby, cradle and all…_

Wandering the corridors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was a hobby for the never-sleeping Head Girl, Hermione Granger. Her lack of sleep was evident due to the violent, purple-ish black circles encased under her eyes. She wasn't studying too hard, surprisingly, and no, she wasn't visiting boys in the middle of the night: she was simply running away from her dreams. Her nightmares.

She was in the west wing of the school, finally deciding to remove the Disillusionment Charm from off of her and stoically sauntered back to her Head Girl quarters. She lifted her long dressing gown as she climbed the stairs, her long brown mane of hair falling to the middle of her back in soft curls. She released a dry sob as she approached a tall portrait of a lion lying in field of grass with a serpent wrapped around its left paw; the lion had a necklace around him, a pendant of a pentacle dangling from off of it. She whispered the password, the pentacle glowing, and slipped into the opening, entering the small common room that she shared with the Head Boy. As she pulled off her night robe to expose her thin, cotton gown she heard a noise that startled her. Turning away from the door that led to her room, she eyed the door across the common room, and saw Draco Malfoy standing there calmly, his hand resting on the knob and his own pyjamas rumpled, hair tousled and eyes droopy from sleep.

"Again, Granger? If you're sneaking out for a snog, at least place a silencing charm on the Portrait door. The creaks could wake up half the bloody castle!" he snapped. The candle light that lit the room flickered across Hermione's face, giving it an eerie shadow as a grim smile graced her lips.

"I'll remember that next time," she replied deeply, her throat raspy from her muffled screams from earlier. Draco eyed her curiously, before nodding and exiting the common room, heading back up to his own private quarters for sleep.

Hermione Granger, student extraordinaire, was left alone once again in the common room. After a few minutes of sorting out her thoughts, she too went up to her private quarters, quietly shutting the door and falling into a sleep plagued with nightmares of blood, betrayal, unthinkable pain, and a face she thought was so handsome at one point…

----

"Hermione, could you pass the butter?" Ron Weasley asked. He sat across from her beside Harry in the Great Hall as they enjoyed a late breakfast on a calm Saturday morning. The weather was quite agreeable, seeing that summer was still lingering in the air and fighting off the approaches of autumn. Hermione, despite the heat, was smothered in a dark blue cardigan with loose fitting jeans that seemed darker than the shade of black, if possible. She was staring aimlessly at her plate, moving its contents about disinterestedly. She had not heard Ron. "Hermione…the butter?" he asked again. This time, Seamus, who was sitting beside her, nudged her roughly in the side. She gasped, dropping her fork onto her plate with a distracting _clank!_ and tenderly touched the side of her body, where Seamus had nudged her.

"Oi, bloody hell Hermione," Seamus muttered, a silly grin on his face. "Don't you hear Ron calling yah?"

"Oh…" she stated. "I…erm…wasn't paying attention," she said, releasing her throbbing side and lifting her face to meet Ron's concerned blue eyes.

"Are you okay Hermione?" Ron asked.

"I'm fine, no problems here…" she said with a smile. Ron gave her a relaxed look. Harry gave her a look that spoke otherwise and cleared his throat.

"Ron was asking for the butter."

"Oh…" she said again. Harry's eyes widen as Hermione wordlessly reached for the plate of butter and handed it to Ron. In all their years at Hogwarts, Hermione had never passed Ron the butter. The butter was _always_ closer to Ron, and he _always_ asked Hermione to get it for him. She would then disagree and break out into a speech about his laziness and how she was not his maid. Ron was also speechless as she handed him the butter, her eyes unfocused, and her mind elsewhere.

"Bloody hell, I think we need to take her to the Infirmary!" Ron gasped out finally. Hermione jumped at the mention of the Infirmary and shook her head, releasing a soft nervous laugh.

"Don't be silly Ron, I'm just tired is all," she started. "I don't want to argue about butter today, so let's just drop it." They all looked at each other quietly before returning back to their plates. A few minutes later, Hermione pushed her plate away and stood from her bench, giving her two best friends a small smile before excusing herself to the library for studying.

When the double doors closed behind her, Hermione stumbled onto the floor inside an alcove, her body shaking with tremors as she sobbed. She covered her face with her hands and cried into them, the pain in her side subsiding enough for her to stand and rest against the stone wall for support. She continued to cry; even as she heard the double doors crack open. Although she wasn't in plain sight, the footsteps grew closer to her form and she quickly covered her mouth with her hand, quieting her weeping.

A shadow blocked her light from the corridor, and she turned away from the wall to see Draco Malfoy standing before her, dressed in all black and holding on to a small green and gold booklet. "What's wrong Granger?" he asked, but not before quickly adding, "did Weasel or Potty break up with you?"

She straightened up hurriedly and smoothed out her clothes, pushing pass the blonde man and entering the corridor. "That is none of your business Malfoy," she said heavily, making her way towards the library. Draco continued to follow her. "What do you want?" she shouted over her shoulder.

"I have our schedule book, and I wanted to go over some things with you…"

"Well," Hermione said softly. "You can come to the library with me, and we can talk it over." He didn't question her tears anymore, but just followed her to the library, schedule book in hand.

-----

**Summer**

"Hello!"

Hermione was sitting on the swings outside in her backyard, head bent over a rather large book when a deep voice made her tumble from out of a rather interesting plotline. She lifted her head to see a boy—a man—staring at her from above the fence that separated their yards. "Hullo," Hermione responded, her eyes filling with general cheerfulness.

"I'm Eric, your new next door neighbor!" he replied with a smile. Hermione smiled right back at him.

"I'm Hermione."

"What a beautiful name..." he answered. Hermione admired the lengths boys would go through to be charming.

She giggled slightly and closed her book. "I thought that the Smithes lived next door." Hermione also thought the Smithes were rather too young to have a son his age, but kept that quiet. He must've been nearing twenty, if anything.

"I'm their nephew. My mum and dad are doctors, and they went on a mission to South America to treat the children there. They won't be back for a year or two, so I'm here with my Aunt Jasmine and her husband Theodore," he explained.

"That's wicked!" Hermione couldn't fight the wishful look that flashed across her face. "I've always wanted to travel to South America!"

Eric chuckled, "maybe I can take you with me when I go and visit them." Hermione's cheeks grew red at the joke and smiled through the blush.

"Why didn't you go with them?" she asked.

"I'm starting University in a couple of months," he answered. "I have to walk in the footsteps of my parents, you see? I have a lot to do, so I decided the sooner I start, the more prouder they'd be," he muttered. "What about you?"

"University?" Hermione asked, laughing. "I attend boarding school; I'm soon to be entering my last year…"

"Fabulous," he grinned. "Would you like to come over for lemonade?" he asked nervously, obviously taking a fancy to Hermione. She smiled and shook her head in the negative.

"Lemonade, no…I absolutely hate it. But tea would be a rather nice alternative," she said, standing from the swing and walking up along the fence. Eric sighed in relief and gave her a dashing smile.

"You got it then!" he exclaimed, opening the door to his own backyard.

----

It was night again.

This time she wouldn't endure the nightmares any more. She took One, Two, Three, _**Four**_ vials of dreamless sleeping draught. She could barely make it to the bed after consuming the horrid liquid, and collapsed on the stairs with an undignified thud.

That was where Draco found her the next morning, barely breathing.

* * *

**Author's Note**: So you all must be wondering _"why the hell is she making yet another story?!"_ Well, I couldn't help it. I even wrote three more chapters plus this to make sure I update regularly. I really like this story. It seems like it'll work. It's dark and very edgy. You might think you know what's happening, but you'll be proven wrong in the end, unless you read carefully. I will be adding chapter one to this next Sunday or Monday, depending on this chapter's outcome in the sea amongst the other fishes. It wouldn't be fair just to have this chapter and it being incredibly short and an introduction. I will then update once every two weeks. It's a schedule I have because I need to work on my other stories. Ugh! 

Also—the chapter titles will always be some sort of nursery rhyme…for a reason.

**Please Review! Constructive criticism is the best. **


	2. The Itsy Bitsy Spider

**Wicked Enraptures **

**Parings:** HG/DM, HP/GW/Implied HG, RW/LL/Implied HG.

**Ratings: **R—some times it will border NC-17. Don't go running to the Admins; I'll dilute some of it out.

**Summary: **Horrible memories from the summer plague Hermione Granger endlessly as she tries to hide her blunders and nightmares from her best friends. However, only one person is bent on finding out what happened to the Head Girl, and that's the one and only Draco Malfoy.

**Author's Note: **A plot bunny that has bitten me, transmitting rabies. Oi! Here it is.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it, and if I did, certain characters would be shagging already.

* * *

**RECAP: **

_It was night again._

_This time she wouldn't endure the nightmares yet again. She took One, Two, Three, __**Four** vials of dreamless sleeping drought. She could barely make it to the bed after consuming the horrid liquid, and collapsed on the stairs.  
_

_That was where Draco found her the next morning, barely breathing._

* * *

**Chapter One:** The Itsy-Bitsy Spider  
_Climbed up the water spout  
Down came the rain  
and washed the spider out  
Out came the sun  
and dried up all the rain  
and the itsy-bitsy spider  
Climbed up the spout again_

-

_She's dying. She's dying. She's dying!_ Draco's mind screamed.

He lifted the girl into his arms, not flinching once and headed out of the stairwell that led to her Quarters. A thin layer of sweat made her cotton nightgown stick to her body. It was only be luck that Draco decided to visit Hermione's personal library space this Sunday morning, believing that he could knick some of her Herbology notes. While coming up her stairs, he tripped over the dying Head Girl; her hair spread out on the next stair and her eyes wide open and unmoving, breath short and labored.

Up until now, Hermione's face was turned into Draco's chest, but when she had turned around, Draco nearly dropped her. Dark, horrendous circles were under her eyes. Draco knew she must've been placing glamour's on her face to hide the bruises. "Oh sweet Morgana," Draco groaned, fear spreading in his belly as he saw the paleness of Hermione's skin, her lips turning a tinge of blue. He found himself running down the corridor, Hermione still in his arms as he made his way to the Infirmary. Madame Pomfrey was aiding a small first year when Draco came bursting into the room.

"MR. MALFOY! HOW DARE YOU! THIS IS NOT A ZOO!" The old woman reprimanded.

"MADAME POMFREY! PLEASE!" Draco ran towards her, Hermione slipping from out of his arms, quickly becoming dead weight. "She's dying…"

"What?!" the nurse squealed. "Put Miss Granger on the bed immediately…" she then ordered. Draco placed her on the nearest bed and the old nurse pulled out her wand and with some fancy wand movement, bright numbers appeared above Hermione.

"My God…her…vital signs…they're completely off! It seems she's being poisoned from within…" the nurse whispered. She removed her wand and placed it in her pocket. She lifted Hermione's limp form into a sitting position and started to shake her. There were no responses from the other girl, so Madame Pomfrey brought her wand back out and placed it on Hermione's chest. "Enervate!" Hermione's eyes fluttered open, and immediately she fell forward onto her lap. She made choking noises and began to thrash around on the bed.

"Please…no…don't hurt me…not anymore…" she whispered softly. It was so soft, only Draco could hear it, as Madame Pomfrey ran to her office to receive the necessary potions. Draco was peering down at Hermione's slow breathing form, her body shaking as she made soft, pleading noises. He placed a hand on her back, but she violently jerked away from him.

"Miss Granger," she was back, several bottles in hand. "I need to know what you took!"

"Granger, what did you take?" Draco asked softly. Hermione scrambled from off the bed suddenly, heading towards the Infirmary's loo. Madame Pomfrey stood rooted the spot, shock clearly written across her face and Draco ran after her, and the nurse could not call him back.

He followed the retching noise, and threw open the bathroom door and saw Hermione before the toilet, vomiting. He stepped closer and saw that she was throwing up what looked suspiciously like black tar, tinged with blood. Draco pulled her hair back as she continued to vomit, and he rubbed her back in slow motions. She finally gasped. "Oh God, Oh God…" she pushed herself back, "Fuck," she whimpered. "_Fuck!"_

"What did you take Granger?" he asked, still holding her hair back. It felt like silk in his hands. With his other hand he flushed the toilet for her, getting rid of the evidence of her sickness. He helped her stand up, and helped her limp over to the sink, where he ran cold water, bending her over the sink, cupping water in his hand and bringing it to her mouth. She clung to him as she sipped the water from his hand, spitting it out into the sink, and then repeated the motion a few more times.

"What did you take?"

"Sleeping draught," Hermione whispered. "I took too much of it…" Draco turned her so she was facing him.

"Are you trying to kill yourself?" Draco asked, his voice wavering ever so slightly. She looked away, her face pained as she contemplated the question. She just wanted to sleep without dreaming. She just wanted to be safe. Was she aware of the consequences? Maybe. Did she care? Absolutely not.

"I don't know," she said hollowly. "I really don't know…"

-----

She didn't tell Harry or Ron about her near-death experience, and Malfoy had resorted to eyeing her suspiciously every time she passed him. Two weeks later, and she could still taste the vomit on the tip of her tongue. Things were briefly tolerable for now. Her two friends walked on either side of her, and she felt protected. But with Malfoy's eyes on her, she felt oddly discontent. She didn't know why, but she accepted the discomfort nonetheless.

The three of them sat at the edge of the lake with their lunch, it being yet another Saturday. Ron and Harry were planning on flying around a bit, both having brought with them their brooms.

"Do you really have to?" Hermione asked with a huff.

"We're just going to arse around in the sky for a bit, you won't be left out too long Hermione," Ron comforted. When they kicked off from the ground, Hermione pulled out a book she borrowed from Ginny. It was sappy and overly romantic but it made Hermione think about love in a new light. It made her think that it could be possibly obtained, and maybe this time she wouldn't be hurt by it. She was halfway through the book when she realized the shift in the characters. It was a foreshadowing that indicated something significant was about to happen. She sat with her legs under her, her half-eaten lunch laid forgotten as she immersed herself into the text.

_Lady Amy felt his hand on her shoulder and she nearly crumpled under it. It was Matthew, not her loving William whose hands were soft and not calloused and rough. He gripped her shoulder tightly, and pulled her around. Looking up into his wild blue eyes, she saw the raw lust in them and released a weak whimper. He cupped her cheek and she swallowed an upcoming scream. He was leaning in now, and captured her lips with an angry passion that soon quickly turned to violence. He threw her up against the church's wall, lifting her small form up and spreading her thighs apart harshly under her heavy dress. She cried out, knowing that she would have bruises later. She was not wearing her cloth, and he had already disrobed himself, his breeches gone and his thick, monstrous member pressed against her hip. He lifted her up further, and pushed painfully into her, making the virgin maid cry out in lost, anger, and pain…_

Hermione dropped the book, her face contorted with horror at what she had just read. She stood to her feet, swaying on the spot. Harry was the first to see her from his spot in the sky, his Seeker skills giving him that ability. "Oi! Hermione! Where are you going?" Harry shouted. Hermione shook her head, not trusting her voice and she turned away from her two friends in the sky. She was running back to the castle now. They were her dreams, speaking to her through the things that surrounded her every day now. Her fear was overcoming her life. She was lost.

She needed sleep.

She made her way to her room. The potion was well hidden from Madame Pomfrey. She pulled open a loose rock under her bed and pulled out a long, thing box, where twenty vials laid. She pulled the box towards her and opened one vial, downing the acid liquid in a heartbeat. She would be careful and only take one, she thought, closing the wooden box and placing it back in its hiding spot. Stripping herself down to a tank top and her panties, Hermione slid under the covers of her warm bed, sleep taking hold of her. Before she finally fell asleep, she took a look at the clock on her bedside table and saw that it was only one in the afternoon.

-----

**Summer**

"Mum," Hermione started, taking a seat at the kitchen table as her mom began to cook dinner. Her father was in the drawing room, looking for his glasses, and she had been waiting to talk to her mother alone since she came home from work.

"Yes love?"

"What if I told you I fancied someone?" she asked. Jane turned to face her daughter, one eyebrow raised in surprise.

"I'd ask if it were Ronald…I know you two fancy each other quite a bit, and he's such a right young lad…I wouldn't mind one bit, and I know your father wouldn't either…"

"No. What if it weren't Ron or Harry? What if it were a muggle?" This suddenly peaked Jane's curiosity.

"Who is he darling?"

"Our new neighbor Eric Beckett from Manchester, he's taken a liking to me."

"Oh, he _is_ handsome…very tall…nice blonde hair and such. I daresay he'd make a good boyfriend. I knew you two were spending a lot of time together. I didn't think it would blossom into romance," Jane giggled. She pointed a raw chicken leg at her daughter. "He's about three years older Hermione. So don't let him think he can boss you around, okay sweetheart?" she asked. Hermione nodded, a blush creeping into her cheeks. Eric was too incredibly sweet to try and boss her around.

"He would never," she whispered back, a small smile gracing her lips.

----

When Hermione awoke, she stretched languidly in her bed, pulling her sheets back and relishing the feel of waking from a dreamless sleep. She always felt good afterwards. The clock shown brightly, telling her it was nearing five in the afternoon. She stood from her bed and quickly threw on jeans and a shirt. She made her way down the stairs, and entered the common room, turning around to lock her door. She was shocked, however, when she saw four parch-it notes on her door.

_Herm—_

_What the bleeding hell is wrong with you? You ran so fast Harry couldn't catch up with you on his Firebolt! _

_Are you okay?_

_-R _

She sighed at Ron's rudeness and crumbled it in her fist, pulling down the next post.

_Mione—_

_Are you okay? I'm worried about you. Nothing has been the same since the Great Fall, and I know we all have demons to battle._

_You need to talk to us. I don't want to lose you._

_-H_

Hermione crumpled this letter too with a sigh. Harry always blamed problems on the after effect of the Defeat of Voldemort. She could care less about it anymore, surprisingly. It didn't bother her. They found the Horcruxes, destroyed them, and then watched and participated as the final battle took hold at Hogwarts. She was slightly unnerved, however, when Headmistress McGonagall allowed Draco Malfoy back into the school, claiming that Dumbledore's portrait supported Draco's innocence. In the end, he had lost both his parents and his home. All he had left was his Gringotts account, making him rich and all alone. She lifted the other note from the door.

_Hermione!_

_Why the hell was my book outside by the lake?_

_If Dean hadn't suggested we snog there, I wouldn't have seen it!_

_See you at dinner love,_

_-Ginny _

Hermione growled at this note, and definitely crumbled it. She _hated_ that book. She thought it was simply impossible for her to hate any type of book. But she found out that she could. Lastly, she looked at the elegant scrawl on the parch-it left on her door, and pulled it off.

_Meet me in the Trophy Room at five-thirty. _

_-DM_

Hermione turned to peer at the Grandfather clock in the common room, tossing the notes in the fireplace. It read a quarter past five. She thought it would be okay to head out early to meet Malfoy. She was one to be punctual.

As she wandered the corridors, she made sure she didn't run into Harry or Ron, who would probably be looking for her now that it was nearing dinner time. Fortunately, she found them and stood quietly behind a statue as words from their conversation peaked her interest.

"…She's all fur coat and no knickers, mate…" Harry consoled a weepy Ron. Hermione watched carefully as Ron sat on the bench near the courtyard beside Harry, who was patting him on the shoulder. "Not a bit natural."

Ron sobbed. "But she was _beautiful_ to me Harry…"

"Yes, but a tad bit plastic-looking." Ron glared. "Maybe she'll forgive you!"

"As if! Lavender is the most sought-after bird here at Hogwarts. She'd never give me a second chance."

"Well there's plenty o'girls out there Ron! I'm sure you'll find someone to suit you."

"Yeah? Who!?"

"Well, you've always fancied Hermione…I'm sure if you made the right moves, she'd date you."

"You…you think?" Ron asked, hopeful.

"Not think: I know mate, I _know_. She's quite fetching, if you ask me. But you know, we've always been friends and I doubt she'd ever look at me in another light. But you? You two have had something going since you laid eyes on each other."

"You're right…"

Hermione found this time to walk away from the two boys, her heart tightening in her chest at the prospect of Ron and her. Maybe she was ready to take that leap.

She was nearing the Trophy Room when she saw the door open, Draco Malfoy staring at her with a look that was somewhat cross.

"You're late."

"Am not…you don't even have a watch!"

"So? I can just tell," he said, holding open the door as she walked into the room. He closed the door after him, and Hermione began to grow nervous being alone in a room with someone who released werewolves and murderous Death Eaters into the school just months ago. She lifted her hazel-brown eyes up to his grey ones and sighed (something she had been doing a lot lately).

"What do you want?"

"Where have you been?" he blurted out, overlapping her question.

"Er…" she started. Draco shifted his weight onto his other foot and looked at her. "What do you mean?"

"You're barely _here_ anymore Granger," he snapped.

"I don't understand!"

"I think you do."

Hermione glowered, "why do you bloody care?"

"When walking over the dying body of your classmate, you tend to care about those things…"

"I was not dying!"

"You were!" he shouted. "When you left the Infirmary Pomfrey told me if I would have waited a minute later to bring you in and have you awoken you would have _died_ Granger. You would be _dead!_ Does that mean anything to you?"

"I don't think anything in my mind has nothing to do with you Malfoy. You should just bugger off because you're being an arsehole!" she walked around him towards the door, but was shocked when he wrapped his hand around her wrist and flung her against the Trophy shelves, making the items inside rattle a bit. He then pressed his body against hers and stared angrily down at her. Hermione wasn't a short girl. She stood a good five feet seven inches, but Draco was still a head-and-a-hall taller than her. She swallowed and closed her eyes, exhaling.

"You look just like him," she whispered. She couldn't help the stinging in her eyes as unshed tears began to flow down her cheeks. "Let me go."

"I can't do that. Not until I know what's wrong with you," he growled.

"I don't want to tell you! I don't want to tell anyone!"

"Did someone hurt you Granger? Did someone…did someone…attack you?"

"YOU DID!" she shouted, jabbing a finger into his chest. "You attacked me!"

"What are you on about?" Draco asked, bewildered. Hermione finally pushed him away and groaned at the soreness of her back from Malfoy tossing her.

"Do you always try to get girls to talk by throwing them against walls and such?" she asked, her voice dripping with hate. "You're a right bastard Malfoy! Don't worry about me, why don't you worry about your lone self and leave me the hell alone!" With that, she stomped out of the room, her head spinning with wild thoughts of what Malfoy's motive could be.

Hermione decided to make her way to dinner and actually eat something, her stomach giving out noises to voice its neglect. Even after the Dreamless Sleeping Draught she had felt queasy and faint, but she blamed it on stress. She respectfully took her seat across from Ron and Harry at the Gryffindor table, with Ginny beside her. She pulled whatever she could reach onto her plate and ate quickly. She did not notice the looks she was getting from her friends as she went through her plate. Ginny giggled. "My goodness Hermione, what's up with you? Are you up the duff?" she joked. Harry and Ron stopped eating to look at the stricken expression on her face.

_Oh my God!_ Her voice screamed. It had never occurred to her…they…she…was never careful.

"Hermione?" Harry asked nervously, noticing the paleness of Hermione's face at Ginny's comment.

"Oh Merlin Hermione…you're not…are you?" Ginny whispered, aghast. Without a word, Hermione stood from her seat and fled the Great Hall.

----

_Dearest Hermione,_

_I was shocked when you asked me to send you an EPT. Are you okay, love? I won't tell your mum, but please, please let me know the results immediately!_

_PS—I don't think I'll ever get used to these ruddy owls!_

_Love,_

_Aunt Maggie_

Hermione opened the box that her mother's sister had sent her. She felt stupid, not thinking about this earlier after…after…her relationship. It had been three days since Ginny's comment about her being pregnant, and now she was avoiding all three of her friends, and Malfoy, who had caught her crying once again the day before. She had forgotten to take her sleeping draught and had a horrible nightmare, and it had completely thrown her off the whole day.

She had tried to discreetly check out pregnancy books from the library, earning an inquiring, yet concerned look from Madame Pince. Now, she was in the common room, Draco no where to be seen, as she spilled over each text and tested herself. She needed the muggle variation because she was no expert in these wizard methods. She took the test and went to the loo. Nervously waiting for the results, Hermione's foot bounced up and down nervously as she sat on the close-lid of the toilet. She suddenly stood up and peered over at the test.

_Yellow—not pregnant_

_Blue—pregnant_

It was blue.

She threw the test across the loo, her heart pounding wildly as she saw her life flush itself down the toilet. She wrapped her arms around her body and bent forward, releasing loud, angry cries. She threw herself against the door and screamed. She didn't want _it_ in her. She threw herself against the door again, this time seriously hurting herself as she slid down the door and unto the ground.

* * *

_**comments are always appreciated. I know this story might be upsetting. Stick around and see what happens. I promise you it's a good read.**_


	3. You Are My Sunshine

**Wicked Enraptures **

**Parings:** HG/DM, HP/GW/Implied HG, RW/LL/Implied HG.

**Ratings: **R—some times it will border NC-17. Don't go running to the Admins; I'll dilute some of it out.

**Summary: **Horrible memories from the summer plague Hermione Granger endlessly as she tries to hide her blunders and nightmares from her best friends. However, only one person is bent on finding out what happened to the Head Girl, and that's the one and only Draco Malfoy.

**Author's Note: **A plot bunny that has bitten me, transmitting rabies. Oi! Here it is.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own it, and if I did, certain characters would be shagging already.

_**RECAP:**_

_She threw the test across the loo, her heart pounding wildly as she saw her life flush itself down the toilet. She wrapped her arms around her body and bent forward, releasing loud, angry cries. She threw herself against the door and screamed. She didn't want __it in her. She threw herself against the door again, this time seriously hurting herself as she slid down the door and unto the floor._

* * *

**Chapter Two:** You Are My Sunshine

_My only sunshine  
you make me happy when skies are gray  
you'll never know dear, how much I love you  
Please don't take my sunshine away._

* * *

After gathering her mess and disposing of it, Hermione exited the loo and entered the common room again. 

However, only to be face-to-face with Draco Malfoy, poring over the text she had checked out from the library, and the letter her aunt had written her. The letter fell from out of his hands in shock as he surveyed the red-eyed girl in front of him. He was opening his mouth when she cut him off.

"Don't ask me it," she whispered, her arms going around her body. "Don't ask me Malfoy because you'll never know…"

He kept silent and walked around the table to stand before her, his eyes briefly flickering down to her flat stomach and then back into her eyes. "I'm sorry; I don't want to do this Hermione…" he whispered, his eyes flickering with reluctance. Hermione gave him a twisted look of surprise.

"Did you just call me—?"

"_Legilimens!"_ Draco bellowed, his wand pointed at her.

It was like an icy hand had cracked open her skull and delved into her mind. She tried to fight the fog that was building in her head as Malfoy made his way around her mind. She remembered what Harry had taught her, and quickly set up her defenses as Draco caught a glimpse of her ex-boyfriend Eric, lying on the ground with blood coming from underneath him.

"NO!" she screamed, finally pushing Draco from out of her mind. She concentrated hard as Draco stumbled backward, his wand still pointed at her as she shouted, "EXPELLIARMUS!" his wand flew in the air as she caught it, and he was flung backwards, crashing into the opposite wall. She panted, not often casting wandless spells. She walked over to Draco who was looking up at her from the ground with a mixture of shock and fear as she slapped him across the face, then pulling back her fist to punch him. She then lost all control, tossing his wand aside and punching, clawing and slapping at his face. He tried to push her off of him, but she continued her onslaught, her frustrated screams mixing with his loud groans of pain. "I HATE YOU!" she bellowed. "I HATE YOU SO MUCH!" she punched him in the nose once more, feeling the bone shatter against her knuckles and blood wetting her skin.

He finally gripped her wrists, adding more pressure than necessary as he bent back her hands, pushing her off of him and onto the floor. He straddled her, blood dripping from his face onto her own as he growled. "Granger," he started. "You bitch." And then he kissed her, tongue, teeth and blood. She could taste him, the coppery taste that stained her teeth and breath just as he could taste her fear and tears.

She began to choke against his mouth, her dread getting the best of her as she hastily tried to push him off. "Get off of me…" she ordered. He didn't move, but continued to kiss her swollen mouth. "I SAID GET OFF!" she screamed, panic gripping her. He finally removed himself, and Hermione touched her face, wiping off the blood that was from Malfoy's face. She stood from her spot on the floor, noticing the bruises already rising around her wrists from where Malfoy gripped her.

She dragged herself to the entrance of the Tower, quickly exiting it without a backwards glance, making her way to a nearby loo where she stood in front of the mirror and cleaned the blood from her face. It looked as if someone had taken ruby red lipstick and smeared it across her lips, upper lips, chin and jaw. She would be heading towards Madame Pomfrey to terminate the pregnancy, soon. She was spitting out dirty water from her mouth when she heard the door open.

"Oh Hermione, you look like death warmed up!" someone giggled. She turned around to see the beautiful Lavender Brown standing in the doorway of the loo accompanied with her equally as beautiful counterpart, Parvati Patil. Lavender was a tall girl with mocha colored skin and startlingly light brown eyes and flowing sandy-brown hair. She smiled at Hermione, exposing a row of perfect straight white teeth, teeth Hermione had always wanted up until a couple of years ago, after the incident with Malfoy.

"Thanks Lavender," Hermione muttered, walking around the two girls to exit. Lavender put out a hand to stop her though.

"Your wrists…they're all to pot…" she said, peering down at them. Hermione jammed her hands into her pocket and shrugged.

"I went to arse around with Harry and I guess we got too rough," Hermione lied. She then blushed at how that sounded because Lavender's eyes were sparkling with interest.

"You and Harry?" she asked with amusement.

"No…we were just playing, nothing serious…" she said, leaving the loo finally. When she stepped out, she heard Lavender say clearly,

"She's such a hag…"

"And so vulgar too," Parvati added.

-----

"Are you listening Miss Granger?"

"What?" Hermione asked, looking across the Infirmary at the nurse. She sat on one of the stiff white beds in a scratchy hospital gown.

"I said, I can give you some options here, if you want concerning the termination of your pregnancy," Madame Pomfrey said, coming to stand before her.

"I just want it out, what other options are there?" Hermione bit back. The nurse raised a brow at the younger girl and frowned.

"Miss Grangers…your manners are most important at this time, so please be appropriate."

"I'm sorry ma'am," Hermione said, looking down at her folded hands. Her once swollen wrists were healed by the nurse, and now she was ready. "I don't want any options. I don't want this child, it wasn't planned and it wasn't conceived through love…I…" Hermione broke into a sob. She felt the truth bubbling up her throat, burning her like stomach acid. "My boyfriend and I are no longer together," she settled with saying.

"I understand," she said. "But there are some side effects that I'd like to talk to you about. After the termination, you will be sick for a couple of days, some vomiting, faint-headedness, and some depression. Now, if any of these problems become persistent, you must come and see me. You will be excused from classes for the next three days so your body can adjust and not fall into shock, after all, you have been pregnant now for a little over a month. Have you told anyone about your pregnancy?"

Hermione thought of Malfoy and the pile of pregnancy books she found. "I did not, ma'am."

"Well, I suppose you'll keep this a private matter? No need informing your parents?"

"They will not be notified, no."

"All right Miss Granger, please lay on your back…that's it…this will hurt a little…you'll feel a stinging sensation," the nurse said, waving her wand above Hermione's stomach.

"Wait…" she said, sitting up. "I…I…" she stuttered, tears welling up in her eyes.

----

**TWO DAYS LATER**

"You're up and down like Tower Bridge," Harry accused, pulling her aside from the moving mass of bodies. It was almost lunch, and Hermione had been avoiding Ron and Harry like the plague since her visit to Madame Pomfrey. "And what happened to Malfoy's nose?"

"I'm under the weather s'all Harry, you know me…studying like mad." She paused. "And I don't know about Malfoy's sudden deformity."

"No," Harry said stiffly. "You haven't turned in a single homework assignment in days. Slughorn asked about you, and so did Headmistress McGonagall. You haven't even checked in with Lupin either, and he's our Head of House!" Harry snapped.

"I just don't feel well, okay!" Hermione shouted, taking Harry off guard. His face flickered between surprise and then anger.

"Fine, if that's how you want it to be, then let it be Hermione. I can't believe you're willing to throw Ron and me away because you're too proud to let us help you!"

"I'm not being proud Harry! I just don't think you quite understand that nothing is wrong with me!"

"But Hermione—"

"Harry!" she cut off. "There's nothing wrong with me! It's been a tough summer s'all and I want to relax, I want to be with my friends and just be happy. Why are you trying to bugger things up?" she asked sadly. Harry frowned.

"I…I'm sorry Hermione. I was just worried. And, well, you know how Ron makes a complete bollocks of situations he can't understand," Harry whispered. "He's basically sworn you off because of this…disconnection we've been having with you."

"Harry, just because Ron's being a total prick doesn't mean you have to follow along…" she reprimanded. He gave a shameful smile and nodded.

"I don't want to lose you…"

"I don't want to lose you either Harry. Just know that it'll never happen because I love you too much. You and Ronald," she whispered, throwing her arms around Harry. He hugged her back tightly and kissed the top of her head.

----

It was raining, and Hermione had ran underneath the fake metal creation shaped as a castle in the park, breathing heavily as her boyfriend pressed himself against her from behind, wrapping his arms around her body and hugging her tightly. She laughed as he gently removed her soppy locks from her neck and kissed the pale skin available to him. She turned to face him, pulling him onto the woodchips that decorated the bottom of the child-made castle. He fell on top of her, his face cracking into a wide grin as she smiled up at him. "I love you," she said softly.

"I love you too," he responded, the shock and happiness evident in his voice. "I've loved you since I laid eyes on you…" there was a clatter of thunder, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into a deep kiss of which he reacted to eagerly. They were hidden from the view of bystanders, and Hermione knew that their relationship was about to take a sharp turn when she slipped her hand up his shirt. He shivered and breathed heavily through his nose as they kissed. He placed his knee between her legs, nudging them apart and slowly working his hands down her body to pull up her skirt. She squirmed, trying to get comfortable as he slid his hand down her leg, stroking it lovingly as she giggled up at him. She was afraid, but didn't let it show. She wanted her first time to be romantic, and she thought this was the way to go. The rain was coming down harder, and Eric had finally removed her knickers, tossing them somewhere behind him. She could feel the slickness between her legs and he groaned in anticipation as he moved to kiss her flat stomach, and then pushed himself onto his knees to quickly undo his jeans. There was a thudding sensation in the pit of her stomach that was fear and arousal battling their wits out. She saw him. All of him…suddenly her heart was flung up her throat as she wondered how that would fit in her, but he was already at her entrance, positioning himself.

"Are you ready?" he asked. She nodded because she knew she'd never be as ready as she was right then and there. He pushed into her in a swift manner and was met with a sharp cry from her. He showered her with small kisses and ran a hand down the side of her face, calming her. She took in several deep breaths as he whispered words of comfort into her ear. He began to move and she met his thrusts, arching her back inward as they tried to reach an intended goal. She was falling backwards, it felt. She was falling backwards onto a soft plushy surface she thought would never disappear because it was love.

She had found a soul mate, _her_ soul mate. They were going to climax together, and Hermione felt all her nerves light with fire as she squeezed her eyes shut, feverishly kissing Eric as he moaned deeply into her mouth. She was opened her eyes to look into his blue ones. But saw nothing but lifeless eyes, drained of color and a gush of blood coming from around her lover's head to fall on top of her.

Hermione screamed, sitting up on the couch. Her head was cloudy with confusion as she began to softly cry. She looked around and saw that a plush green comforter was pooling around her waist, and that the fire was roaring in the fireplace. She trembled as a movement caught in the corner of her eye. It was Malfoy, sleeping quietly in the chair adjacent to hers, his robe tucked under his chin to serve as a blanket. He was snoring slightly.

_Was the scream in my head?_ She asked herself. She wiped a tear from her face as she glared hatefully at Draco's form. His nose still had an ugly bruise on the bridge of it, and he was sporting a fading, but still evident, shiner. She quietly made her way to her bedroom, feeling the nausea churn in her stomach like a hateful whisper. She would never be able to get used to this, even if it was for just a few weeks.


	4. Hush Darling and Don't You Cry

**Wicked Enraptures **

**Parings:** HG/DM, HP/GW/Implied HG, RW/LL/Implied HG.

**Ratings: **M due to violence, language, and a whole lot of scary shit.

**Summary: **You can't run from your mistakes.

**Author's Note: **I can't believe it's been nearly a year since I've updated! That's so scary how life just moves on by without you. I hope you all can forgive me for neglecting this story and all my other ones. I hope you reconnect with this, I truly feel like it has a good plot. **This is a short chapter to ease you all back into the story. Thank you and please leave your thoughts at the end.**

**Disclaimer:** Need I list them?

* * *

**Chapter Four: **

Hush Darling and Don't You Cry

_Hush my darling don't you cry,don't be scared of all the love you just can't hide, I know my sweet love you have been hurt before, but that was before and I am your ever more and you know it's you my lady I adore…_

-

She was standing up to him, her hands placed firmly at her hips as she shouted back. He was angry at her again, for reasons unknown to her but annoying nonetheless. He was shouting at the top of his lungs, calling her a stupid bint, and this made her so angry. She called him a prick and he pushed her. She pushed him back with just as much fervor, and he gripped her by the arms to yank her forward. He slapped her. She immediately froze, bringing a shaking hand to the hot patch on her cheek, left by his hand.

He was in an initial shock and panicked at the bewildered eyes of his girlfriend, who was frantically searching his eyes for an explanation. He brought her to his chest. He then folded his arms around her tightly, hugging her and kissing the side of her face as he apologized for the shouting, the anger, and the slap. He held her so tight.

It was the first time.

-

"Miss Granger…Hermione, may I please speak with you?" Professor Lupin pursed his thin lips, similar to Professor McGonagall and watched as Hermione placed her bag back onto the ground, her peers leaving as the bell finished ringing, ending class. Harry and Ron shot her a questioning glance before she shooed them away.

"Yes Professor?" she asked, standing before his desk.

"Are you ill, Hermione?" Lupin asked, his golden eyes filled with concern. She shook her head. "Then what is ailing you? You've been unfocused in class; you've skipped your Head meetings, and did not turn in any homework all last week. I feel that your grades are unnecessarily slipping, and I am worried about you."

Hermione forced her eyes downward to avoid Lupin's honestly concerned eyes. She couldn't help but feel the truth bubble up her throat—the truth to all her ails and fears—the truth of her insecurity and the damage she had done to her body. She couldn't.

"I've been down with something, possibly the flu, you know, a silly cold that I picked up. I've visited Madame Pomfrey already, she could tell you." Her lie was impossibly botched, but as she glanced up at Lupin, she could see the inner-workings of his mind twist and turn as it assessed her truthfulness.

"I promise I'll get your work in Professor, I've been ill…"

"You're excused Miss Granger," he said with a curt nod, looking down at the papers students had turned in on his desk. She jumped a little at the abruptness and quickly left the classroom, not oblivious to his concerned stares.

She was crying again. In the small confines of her room, she decided to skip dinner, wanting to avoid her friends for a while. Her stomach pained her, and like Madame Pomfrey had said, most of the pain would be psychological. She didn't know what was real anymore.

Staring up at the ceiling, she found herself reminiscing through the tears. She remembered the flash of fear from her boyfriend's eyes before the end came. She wanted to help him, but something in her had snapped—it broke—she couldn't help him. The bruises on her neck still burned, after all, and that was still fresh in her mind.

She ran a hand down her flat, empty stomach. The thing had been purged from her body. Had she had doubt? Yes. But she had made the right decision, and now that memory was extracted from her body.

But why did it hurt her so much? The tears wouldn't stop. As much as she tried to forgive herself, she couldn't. She couldn't forgive herself for what happened in that house over the summer. She couldn't forget the police that came, the questioning, the tears, the frantic explanations, the lies…and finally the cold. The cold that still haunted her.

She lifted a pillow and placed it over her face, clenching the edges and screaming into it. Through her screams, she didn't hear the faint knocking that had suddenly gotten louder. Startled, she removed the pillow from her face and looked towards the door.

"Granger!" shouted a panicked Malfoy, "open up or I'm coming in!"

"GO AWAY!" she roared at the door, not wanting to see him. She had avoided him for quite some time successfully and he was about to ruin that streak.

The door swung open, revealing a disgruntled Malfoy. His wand was clenched tightly in his hand, and he stared at her, lying on the bed in the corner of the room. Their eyes were locked, and something feverish came over her under that glare. "How dare you enter my room unwanted, Malfoy…" she said in a deadly fashion. Malfoy placed away his wand and searched his pocket, pulling out a scroll. It had the seal of the Headmistress on it.

"I have been forced by the Headmistress, Professor Lupin, and Madame Pomfrey to look after your wellbeing while in the Head Quarters. I'm also supposed to look after you during patrols…I don't like this either Granger, but I'm being forced to do it," he said with a look of disinterest.

He came up to the side of her bed, and she recoiled, moving into the far corner of the bed, hiding under the shadows cast by the drapery. "I'm not going to hurt you, Hermione."

"Don't talk to me like that! Don't you say my name, Malfoy…" she took a deep breath, "I didn't forget what happened…you fucking prick…"

"I was looking after _you_ Granger. You're pregnant, aren't you?"

"No!" she spat out. Her eyes turned black with hatred. "I got rid of it."

He was taken aback by the hardness of her voice. He shook in head in disbelief. "What happened to you, Granger?"

"Why do you care?"

"I just want to help you, as crazy as that sounds. Seeing you nearly dead on your staircase did something to me, and I don't ever what to see something like that again…"

"Then stay away from me, and maybe you won't have to encounter such an incident ever again. Bugger off Malfoy and let me be…"

"I know someone hurt you. I know that you're afraid to let people—men specifically—come near you." At this, he sat on the edge of her bed, making her press herself against the wall. "I know that something happened this past summer that gives you nightmares and whoever did this to you also got you pregnant."

"You don't know shite," she hissed. "Now get the _fuck_ out of my room!" He stood from her bed, throwing the scroll where he had just sat, and exited her room, slamming the door with an unnecessary force. Instead of opening and reading the scroll, she picked it up and threw it across the room, watching as it flew into a glass that was sitting at her vanity, knocking it over and sending it crashing to the ground in a million little pieces.

She hated herself.

-

**That Same Evening**

-

"_You don't know what you're doing—I advise you to _shut the fuck up_ right now Hermione!"_

"_Just tell me what I did wrong," she pleaded. He had her pinned against the wall by the neck, her hands trying to pull away the tightness of his grip. She was starting to see spots._

"_I know what you're trying to do…and I swear to God Hermione, I'm not going to let you leave me. Even if I have to kill you first there's no way in fucking hell I'm going to let you leave me."_

"_Please…" she cried. "I love you."_

"_But I love you more."_

There was a scream. Tears of pain as he ripped through her. A struggle. A push. A flash of fear. Thudding. Cracks. Loud flailing. Another scream. Blood was everywhere and there was no one there to help.

She was screaming in her sleep again. She was sweating and her nose was running. Bringing her hand up to her nose, she pulled her fingers away and caught in the moonlight blood. Her nose was bleeding and as it ran down her lips and onto her nightdress and sheets she could hear the peddling of feet approach her door which swung open immediately.

Draco was at her door. He stared at her. She started to cry.

He was at her side, his arms wrapped around her in a heartbeat.

* * *

**Please leave your thoughts.**


	5. Golden Slumbers

Wicked Enraptures

**Wicked Enraptures**

**Parings:** HG/DM, HP/GW/Implied HG, RW/LL/Implied HG.

**Ratings:** M due to violence, language, and a whole lot of scary shit.

**Summary:** You can't run from your mistakes.

**Author's Note:** I've updated, as you can see! If you're up for a little bit of romantic humor, please read my **NEW DMHG story D.I.V.O.R.C.E** It's really nice to get positive feedback on any of my stories!

**Disclaimer:** Need I list them?

* * *

**Chapter Five:** Golden Slumbers

_Golden slumber kiss your eyes,_

_Smiles await you when you rise._

_Sleep,_

_Pretty baby,_

_Do not cry,_

_And I'll sing you a lullaby._

--

She didn't stop crying until she felt his hands run down her hair and rest on the small of her back. The tears, at that exact moment, stopped falling and the sobs subsided. An icy shock fell over her and she jerked from out of his embrace, throwing herself wildly against the wall and staring at him through shocked eyes. Her body began to convulse as a panic attack made itself known. She tried taking large gulps of air through her mouth and nostrils but couldn't get enough, making her throw her hands around her neck, struggling. She fell over, her face crushing into the sheets.

Draco stood abruptly, staring down at her in confusion and shock. Without thinking he got onto the bed and moved to the corner she was huddled in. She shook violently but couldn't speak, her voice caught with her breath. He pulled her into his lap as he sat back on his legs, lifting her gently, not at all disturbed by the blood that was trickling down her face. She started crying again and all he could do was soothe her.

"Granger, you need help," he said softly. She shook her head and trembled. "You do. This is becoming too much, you have to get help so you can get better." Again, she shook her head. "LISTEN to me," he said forcefully. "You've been through a lot, and you need help."

.

"_But I love you more," he said. _

_A whine escaped from her chaffed lips as he held her against the wall. She started to struggle against him, her body growing weak as his grip slowly made her lose conscious._

"_I know you love me, I wouldn't leave you."_

"_Then why do you keep talking about leaving in September?"_

"_I…I have to go back to school!"_

"_Bullocks! You lying bitch! I've checked all the boarding schools in the UK and you don't attend any of them…" he hissed. Hermione gasped and started to panic at the manic look in his eyes. She struggled again, knowing that she would die in his grasp if she didn't free herself. _

"_STOP!" she screamed with the little oxygen she had left. "PLEASE! You're killing me!" _

"_I told you, you won't leave my house alive…"_

"_Fuck you," she cried helplessly._

"_No…fuck you," he said, releasing her. She fell to the floor in a heap and tried to regain her breath. Before she could, he had grabbed her again, pushing her onto her back as he got on top of her. "Fuck me?" he asked. "Fuck me indeed, Hermione."_

_She screamed._

.

"Get out," she croaked, lifting herself up from his lap. He was so close to her, so close she could smell the faint sent of his shampoo or soap that he must've used. She could feel the oncoming of vomit, and didn't want to get sick all over him. She didn't want him there at all. She wiped the tears from her eyes and stood up straighter. He tried to reach out for her, but she pulled back. "I _don't_ need you here! I don't need help Malfoy! I _need_ you to stop being a stalker and following me around, asking me if I'm okay and suggesting that I should get help. I HATE you! I hate you because…you made my life hell! You still are…you're disgusting, you're a bigot, you're not worth the lint on my sweater!" she shouted.

"I'm sick of this Granger!" he said wildly, making her jump. "Do you think I want to be here? Do you think I want to be cradling your mudblood arse in the dead of the night, consoling you? I HATE you too, you ungrateful hag," he said, getting up. "I'm here because I was ORDERED to do so, and don't you ever think that it was for noble reasons. I'm a Malfoy and no filthy mudblood will ever change that, especially you, so don't you dare insult me. I'm far from disgusting, you piece of shite whore."

She held back another of wave of tears that had struck her, making her blink rapidly at his words. She could tell that he knew he had hurt her, after all, the words were meant to hit her hard. She scowled at him instead. "Get out of here," she hissed. "Get out and you tell Professor McGonagall and whoever else gave you that scroll that they can rot in hell for all I care!"

"You don't hate me for those reasons alone Granger, and I know that…" he said ominously. "You know it…why, why do you hate me so much?"

"Shut up!" she shouted, but he kept on talking.

"You can barely look at me without trembling, or freaking out, so tell me Granger, what makes you look at me with so much disdain? So much suspicion and anger and pain?"

"I told you to get out!"

"TELL ME!" he exploded.

"Because you LOOK LIKE HIM!" she screamed finally, sobbing all at once. "Because every time I see you I see him and it makes me sick! It makes me hate you more because you're just like him! You might look charming on the outside but on the inside you're evil and hateful and you'll hurt me just like he hurt me! You have the same hair! You have the same features, same height and scowl! You're evil, just like him! You're evil and if I'm not careful, you'll try and hurt me, you'll try to kill me!" she said brokenly, a sob escaping her lips.

"What did he do to you?"

"What _didn't_ he do to me is the question, Malfoy," she said softly, her wall slowly crumbling.

"Did he beat you?" he asked. She nodded. "Did he…did he…?" she nodded again, knowing what the question was and turned to look anywhere but at him. She heard him draw in a sharp breath.

"What happened to him?" she remained quiet at his question. "I saw your memory, Granger. I saw the blood around him. Tell me."

"Nothing happened, you saw nothing."

"I saw that guy bleeding to death, Granger!"

"YOU SAW NOTHING!" she shouted, anger rising out of her once more. "Get the hell out of my room Malfoy. Did you forget that you don't want to be around a mudblood like me…a whore like me? Did you forget that?"

"I must say though Granger, this bit of information changes things quite a bit," he said quietly.

"I don't need your sympathy. I've moved on."

"No you haven't," he said, giving her a doubtful look. She looked at him completely, not avoiding any aspect of his form. He stood before her bed; the moonlight that poured in came from behind him and encased him, his features sharpen in the path of the light. His hair glowed, as did the light grayness of his eyes. She looked away then, fear consuming her as she closed her eyes and thought of the man who had ruined her…who had ruined everything she was about and everything she wanted to become. She thought of the man before her and knew he would too have his chance to ruin her.

"You're going to let all your cronies in on this, aren't you, Malfoy? You're going to go back to your pug-faced girlfriend and your oafish friends and laugh at me behind my back? You're going to tell them about Eric and how he hurt me, aren't you?"

He stared at her, his jaw clenching at the sight of her and their eyes locked. "Again, Granger, you insult me. I wouldn't tell a soul about this…even if it is about _you._ I have no reason to do that to you, especially about something as horrendous as that. You may think I am a monster, but you know nothing about me. He stepped closer to her, lifting a foot and pressing his knee onto the edge of the bed as he leaned in. "You don't know anything at all about me. I'm not the young boy who used to hex you from behind, Granger. I'm not the boy who used to cower behind his cronies and listen to what his father spewed about over brunch. You will never know me."

There was a pregnant pause, in which Hermione ceased in her crying and sobbing to think. She broke the silence. "Why did you kiss me?"

Draco froze, and withdrew her presence from the edge of her bed, stepping away slowly. "Don't ask questions you're not equipped to handle, Granger. I think it's best that you get some sleep and enjoy the remaining hours before class."

She gave him a swift nod and watched as he left her room, his echo disappearing after a while. She fell back into a troubled sleep, memories once again falling into place without her dreamless concoction.

.

_She was dizzy when he grabbed her from off the ground, her body sore and badly beaten. He flung her across the room, making her land roughly in the hall outside of his bedroom. There was a winding staircase just behind her, and she crawled over to it, reaching out to grab its banister so she could pull herself up, but couldn't. She felt fingers run through her hair then, almost soothingly. She turned and fell directly into his open arms. Terrified, she timidly wrapped her arms around his body. He was sitting on the ground now, running his hands through her hair and his other hand at the small of her back. _

"_Tell me you won't leave me," he whispered against the side of her neck._

"_I won't leave you, please, I won't. I won't ever leave you, I love you, I love you," she said, rubbing her hand up and down his arm. _

"_I'm the only person that can make you happy. I'm the only person you need that can help you achieve extreme happiness, Hermione," he said sweetly, as if he were talking to a small child. She nodded against his shoulder. _

"_You've everything I could ever hope for," she sobbed. He had rubbed her too hard on her back, aggravating a bruise. She jerked and regretted it soon after. The hand that was caressing her hair turned into a fist, and he yanked her head back so he could look her in the eyes._

"_You're a liar," he growled. _

"_No…no…I love you!" she whimpered. The arm that was at her back was removed and she felt the blow before she could comprehend that it was even gone from that position. The side of her face exploded, but he still remained a firm grip on her hair, making her head remain still during the blow. He punched her again. And again. And again._

_And then she finally lost it all. _

_--_

"Hermione," Harry said, drawing her attention. She turned to listen, her head currently buried in her transfiguration book as she scribbled down furiously. She looked up to see a broad smile on Harry's face. Ron sat beside him, a scowl on his face and a hand frustratingly buried in his hair as he stared down in disbelief at his charms assignment.

"Yes Harry?"

He continued to smile and shook his head. "It's nothing…I'm just really happy to see you like this."

She glanced down at her book and felt her heart melt a little bit. She had wanted so much to find herself again, to just move forward and try to get back on track with her life. It had been a couple of week since her confrontation with Malfoy. She hadn't heard any nasty rumors flying around, so she conceded to the fact that Malfoy was a man of his word. But her friends had noticed, and they were worried about her. They noticed that she was changing, and now they noticed that she was slowly coming back.

"I was just not feeling well, Harry. But it's wonderful to be back to old habits," she laughed a genuine laugh, and smiled at him.

"I also heard from Professor Lupin that you were up to date with all your assignments, that's really wonderful, Hermione," he continued. "I mean, he wasn't sharing that information with me willingly, mind you. We were all just really concerned."

"I understand, Harry," she said, placing a comforting hand on his hand. "I really do. I would've done that same if it were you."

They were in the library, a place Hermione had practically lived in for the past week. She brought Harry and Ron with her every time, and studied and worked on old assignments, which were turned in and marked already. She had started to come to the Gryffindor common room to stay with them, and even on occasion slept in her old bed in the seventh year girl's room with Lavender and Parvati, no matter how much she disliked them. The fact that she was in a familiar setting helped her and made her feel comfortable. She didn't wake up screaming, but still had nightmares. She reminded herself daily that it was over—that part of her life was over and done with. She would no longer cower in the shadows of night worried about a man who tried to kill her, a man who had claimed to love her. She no longer thought of his bleeding form and the blood that was on her hands. On her hands and pouring onto her lap as she cried a hundred times that she was sorry.

When they were finished studying, Hermione stood up and gathered her books. Harry and Ron stood on either side of her, flanking her with a protection that she yearned for.

"I'm off to patrol…I'll see you guys tomorrow?" she asked.

"You're not coming back to the common room?" Ron asked, confused.

"I might…I have a few things in my room that I actually need," she said, thinking about her cauldrons, parch pads, and quills. But I don't want you two waiting up for me, in case I don't come. So I'll see you both bright an early at breakfast," she said. Harry hugged her, and Ron followed, the tips of his ears turning bright pink.

--

"You guys have to go back to your dorms," Hermione said, the light from her wand landing on two straying second year girls wandering the corridor near the astronomy tower.

"We heard a noise coming from the top of the staircase," one student said, turning red at Hermione's curious stare. The other one nodded.

"Yeah, like a howling! Like a werewolf!"

"Bullocks, Mandy, it was like a person sobbing!"

"Yeah, Sue, like a _werewolf_…"

"Werewolves don't _sob_!"

"Okay!" Hermione snapped. "Twenty points from Hufflepuff for being out so late. Now get moving or I'll start dishing out detentions," Hermione said crossly, watching the two ditzy girls head in the direction of the dorm.

Hermione's eyes landed on the door leading to the staircase of the astronomy tower. She entered the darken pathway, casting an imperturbable charm on her footsteps so no one could hear her coming. She paused at the entrance and saw a figure sitting up against a statue and staring up at the black, star littered sky. She stepped forward, just a little bit more, to get a better look. When she realized who it was, the person had already turned to see her standing there, wand in hand. She couldn't leave now. It was Malfoy, leaning against the statute, in a state of quiet thought and reflection. Turning around and leaving, she thought, would be extremely awkward and consequential afterwards.

"Granger," he said, nodding at her in greeting. She stared warily at him and continued to maneuver her way towards him.

"Malfoy, what are you doing? You're assigned to patrol the West Wing of the school."

"I finished already."

"But—" Hermione started, about to complain about the time, when she was interrupted by him.

"Where have you been?" he asked. "You're hardly in the room. Have you shacked up with the Gryffindors again?" he said, with less menace than he probably meant to give.

"I'm touched that you've noticed my lack of presence, Malfoy," she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Yes, I've been staying in my old dorm. I just missed it there," she explained slowly. She didn't know why she was explaining herself to Malfoy. Suddenly, an important thought struck her.

"Were you…howling and or sobbing at all?" she asked. Malfoy's head snapped to stare at her, his cheeks draining of color.

'What? What are you talking about?"

"I found two students in the corridor who said they heard howling coming from up here."

"Perhaps it was the wind?" he suggested, becoming uncomfortable.

Hermione noticed how stiff the air had become and fidgeted. "Were you crying, Malfoy?"

He stood then, and stared back up at the stars. "Have you noticed that stars don't twinkle the way you thought they would?"

Her eyebrows grew together in confusion at his statement. She folded her arms. "What are you on about?"

"Like in the lullaby you probably heard as a child, the twinkling of the stars, they're not so wonderfully bright."

She didn't question his knowledge of the Muggle lullaby, but decided to respond to his comment. "Nothing is ever what it's said to be, Malfoy. Life is not what you expect it to be, no matter how many times you were reassured as a child that it would be whatever you wanted it to be. Happiness isn't achieved through words and melodies...or people, for that matter. No matter how many lullabies that were sung to me as a child, my life will never be a diamond in the sky."

He nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I don't know what to think anymore about my life," he said sadly. "I don't know how to react…how to…take on things…not anymore. Not now." There was a cold gush of air that struck her, she shivered and wanted nothing more than to walk away from this awkward conversation with Malfoy.

"What's changed you?" she asked. Draco hunched over.

"You."

"What?" she said, stunned.

"You, Granger. You! Damn it," he swore. He looked up at the stars again. "Damn it, I hate you…I…I _need_ to hate you. But, at the same time, I want to…fuck…I want to _help_ you."

"I told you before, Malfoy. I don't need your help."

"I know you said that. You said a lot of things that night, but listen to me, listen to me and understand that with every blood cell in my bloody body, Granger, I want you…"

"No…" she whispered, shaking her head. "No…you don't mean that," she said aghast.

"I know it's wrong," he whispered.

"You're not attracted to _me_, Malfoy. You're attracted to the pain. The pain and hurt I'm feeling. I don't trust you, and I will never trust you with my heart, let alone my feelings. I made the mistake of opening up to you the last time we spoke, but so help me Merlin, it will never happen again."

He nodded, as if conceding to the fact that he would never pursue her. She didn't know what to do. She stood there, watching him. He looked so very much like Eric. So very much like him. A dark wave of pain overcame her and she felt her body suffocate under its pressure. Malfoy indeed brought out the worse of her feelings.

"I'm not attracted to the pain, Granger. I'm attracted to the person who could survive a summer of absolute hell and still be able to come back from it, however slowly that process may have been. I've seen you, improving these last couple of weeks. Whatever you have to do to get better, I won't get in the way with foolish taunts and pranks. I truly care about your wellbeing. Headmistress McGonagall gave me a chore to complete, and I realized that I can't force you. I can't force you to take me for who I am. I can't force you to see who I am. I can't force you to…to want me. But I can stand here and watch you, watch you grow into the girl who once punched the daylights out of me in third year."

"You speak as if you're nostalgic of me, Malfoy," Hermione said bitterly. "You accused me of not knowing you, remember? Well, you don't know me either, and I'm advising you to stop what you're doing. Don't fall for me. Don't cry to me, damn it, I never asked for a shoulder to cry on, let alone yours. Just don't." She shivered. "I don't want to know you…I…there's nothing there, Malfoy. Really, there's nothing there, and what you're feeling…if you're feeling at all…is not real. It's not REAL! Snap out of your bullocks of fairytales and lullabies and come back to the reality at hand. I will never be with you and you don't want me. You don't want me as a lover and you don't want me as a friend. You want me as your enemy, and that's all I know and will ever acknowledge between us."

She could have sworn she heard a slight choking from his form, but she kept that speculation to herself, instead turning to the leave the tower. As she left, she heard him call her out, just in time.

"You can't run from your mistakes, Hermione," he said cryptically. Hermione froze, her heart dropping to the solid cold ground underneath her. She didn't know what he truly meant, so she swallowed down her fear and kept walking, leaving Malfoy behind her. Her fallen heart still thudding violently against her ribcage.

* * *

Thank you so much for reading. D.I.V.O.R.C.E will be updated soon! This story will be updated soon as well. Just to let you all know, I think this will be a short story, no more than ten chapters, so expect a lot in the upcoming chappies!

Thank you and please review!


	6. Where is My Mind?

**Wicked Enraptures**

Parings: HG/DM, HP/GW/Implied HG, RW/LL/Implied HG.

Ratings: M due to violence, language, and a whole lot of scary shit.

Summary: You can't run from your mistakes.

Author's Note: sorry for the lateness of this chapter. I'm trying to get all my stories back on track. D.I.V.O.R.C.E. will be updated very, very, very soon, so keep an eye out for that.

Disclaimer: **This is a very dark chapter. DON'T READ THIS CHAPTER AND FLAME ME LATER. THANK YOU!!!  


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**Chapter Six:**

**Where is My Mind?**

With your feet in the air and your head on the ground

Try this trick and spin it, yeah

Your head'll collapse if there's nothing in it

And you'll ask yourself,

"Where is my mind?"

* * *

"No…no…I love you!" she whimpered. The arm that was at her back was removed and she felt the blow before she could comprehend that it was even gone from that position. The side of her face exploded, but he still remained a firm grip on her hair, making her head remain still during the blow. He punched her again. And again. And again.

And then she finally lost it all.

A wild fury burst through her, her body seizing at the force. She could feel the magic shooting through her body to the tips of her fingers, sending an electrocuted shock from her and into her boyfriend. He yelped and released her. She fell onto her back, her head hitting the bars of the staircase. She released a muffled cry at the impact, her head falling forward onto her chest for a second as her body protested in pain. Looking up she saw the fearful look on Eric's face, but it was gone just as fast as it came. He lunged at her, his hands wrapping about her neck as she struggled to once again be released from his grasp. He was going to kill her.

"No!" she shouted, kneeing him in the groin. He fell onto his side, his hands moving downward to cup his offended person. She scrambled to her feet and with all her strength pulled back her leg and kicked in his abdomen. He shouted in pain and she repeatedly kicked him. He regained the upper hand, though, by grabbing her foot and yanking her towards him. She fell forward, nearly tripping over him and falling down the stairs. She held onto the banister to interrupt her tumble forward. He still gripped her ankle; applying so much pressure she thought for sure he would break it.

"You _stupid bitch_," he hissed, glaring up at her. He pulled her again and this time, using the banister for strength, she pulled her foot from his grasp, feeling something pop as she did so. She cried out but was able to get loose. She successfully stumbled back, limping backwards until she was pressed against the wall. Eric was on his feet before she knew it. He grabbed her, but this time she was ready. Beside her was a hallway table with a telephone on it. Grasping it in her hands, she ripped it from off the table and slammed it against his face one—two—three times. He jerked back, caught off balance, his hands coming up to catch the blood that was gushing from his face. After a fleeting second, he tried to reach out for her again, and with all the fury in her body, Hermione screamed, lunging forward and knocking him down long path of stairs below him.

Her heart stopped as she saw him fall back, his body turning and twisting in unnatural ways until he landed with a crack onto the bottom level. She screams as she saw the pool of blood begin to seep from his head. She noticed the bloodstains that were covered on the stairs, bloody handprints streaking the walls from where he placed them on his way down. She began to tremble, fear creeping into her making her freeze to death. She slowly moved towards the mouth of the staircase, walking slowly down the stairs until she reached him. Stepping over his body she knelt down beside him. His beautiful face was barely unrecognizable, it was covered in blood, and her heart thudded so painfully as her hands reached out to gingerly touch it.

There was a jerking movement and Eric gasped deeply, his body convulsing as he tried to breathe. He was alive. Hermione gasped in shock. Her mind began to race as the man before her began to wake back up, his body, although broken, twitching with movement. Without thinking, she took her hands, covering his mouth and nose and leaning heavily onto his face, her eyes closed as she suffocated him.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered as he struggled against her. "I'm so sorry, but I have to…" she began whimpering, tears spilling down her cheeks. Soon, he stopped moving and she could no longer feel the struggled breaths beneath her hands. She removed her hands and opened her eyes. Eric had stopped breathing; his eyes wide open with a look of fear screaming from them. She cried out. Turning her hands forward she saw all the blood covered over her hands, and on her clothes from kneeling in the blood coming from her boyfriend. Frantic, she fell forward onto him, her silent tears turning into wails as she wrapped her arms around her lifeless boyfriend. She kissed his bloody face, repeating her apologies to him.

---

Hermione sat frozenly in the Great Hall. It was Halloween and the festivities were in full swing as the students hooted and applauded at the show the ghosts put on every year for Halloween. She sat blankly, her food becoming cold as her mind replayed the day she murdered Eric. She didn't know what had triggered it—but here she sat, her body icy with fear at the memory.

"Hermione! C'mon, join in on the festivities!" Ron said loudly over the laughter and applause.

She was shaken out of her trance, her lips cracking into a small smile. She began clapping with her fellow students, as if nothing was out of sorts with her. No one knew the manic memories that plagued her mind every day. She, to them, had gone back to the Old Hermione. She wasn't sad anymore, or strange acting. She did her homework on time, laughed at all their jokes, and seemed good. She believed it too sometimes. That she was fine.

No one knew they were sitting with a murderer.

---

Later that night, Hermione decided to return back to her own quarters for the night, not really feeling up to her old roommate's gossip tonight. She made her trek to her tower, hesitant and worried that she may run into Malfoy, who she hadn't seen since his confession on the tower. She didn't want to face him. She didn't want to face the man that looked so much like the man she had killed over the summer.

But alas, no God was on her side. Malfoy was sitting in the common room reading a book, and was completely surprised to see her.

"Coming back to old habits, Granger?" he whispered. She probably wouldn't have heard him if she wasn't straining to hear if he would say something in the first place. Her heart thudded at the comment. Was she going back to old habits? Was she going back to being severely depressed? She could have a somewhat good night sleep, now. She was able to wake up from a nightmare before feeling the real burst of fear that usually accompanied it. "Was it good for you, Granger? Ignoring me for such a long time? Do you think that that by you avoiding me I would forget all that you've told me? You've been so mysterious Granger…I want to know what the hell is going on with you."

She ignored his comments though, still walking towards her door to her own room. She was stopped however. Malfoy had gotten up from his couch and was blocking her from moving forward. He reached out to grab her and she reeled back, but not far enough. His hands gathered tightly around her robe and he pulled her forward, "Tell me now."

"What for? I don't owe you an explanation of my life or anything, Malfoy. Sod off and mind your own business."

"I don't want to hear your life story Granger. I would rather like to hear about how you were raped and beaten over the summer, and what happened to the bastard that did it to you," he said coldly. She flinched at that.

"Why are you doing this? I don't want anything to do with you, you shouldn't even care what has happened to me, I don't want anything from you!" she repeated harshly. He shook her.

"I'm not going to let this go…I'm going to find out what happened, because believe it or not, Granger, I know that you're hiding something…it's killing me, not knowing what it is," he said.

"Let it kill you. I hope it _does_ kill you…" she spat in his face, it landed on his cheek. He was so furious, but he did not move to retaliate. She thought that perhaps this was a punishment for snuffing Malfoy's confession of feelings for her. She thought that he would take the hint and know what she wanted nothing to do with him—that she hated him. As the spit slid to his chin, he shook her once more, her head jerking back as his piercing eyes bore into her eyes, invading her mind.

"NO!"

"_No…please…stop!" Hermione shouted. He had thrown her onto the floor, pulling her skirt up and ripping her knickers off painfully._

"_Why do insist on wearing these 'Mione? I won't tell you again…" he said coldly. Her boyfriend was above her, about to take advantage of her again. She didn't want to sleep with him, but it wasn't really up to her anymore, no matter how many times she screamed no, it just fueled his lust for her. "You're hurting me!" she cried, as if it would matter to him. He didn't care. He pushed inside of her, taking her right there in her parent's sitting room on the floor, her parents at work. She realized that he wasn't wearing a condom and she began to panic. _

"_Stop…please…we're not even protected," she continued. She was able to get her arms between their bodies, trying to push him away from her. _

_He grunted, as if to dismiss her comment. Unsatisfied, he pulled from out of her and turned her onto her stomach. Gripped her hips and pulling back he pulled her onto her knees. She then began to become even more fearful of what he would do. He entered her rectum, making her scream out in pain. He made a noise of pain as well, but continued on with the assault. The pain was unthinkable and inane. She screamed as he pushed further into her, her body shaking under his as humiliation countered her feeling of pain. Her face was crushed into the carpet as she felt him ejaculate inside of her._

-

_It was dark. Really dark outside. She was walking home from the nearby library, the summer sun gone from the sky, leaving only the pitch black night, only punctured by light with scattered street lights. She was about ten blocks away from the cluster of her neighborhood when she heard a voice._

"_Hermione! Hey, Hermione!" shouted a male voice. She spun on her heel, startled by the shout. Driving up in a small car was her schoolyard friend Ryan. Before Hogwarts, she had a small group of friends that she would play with, and Ryan was her immediate friend. He stopped his car just short of her and she walked towards his car, a wide smile splitting across her face. _

_It had been such a while since she'd seen him, she saw him a summer ago, to be exact. He looked good, with his sugar brown hair and sparkling green eyes. Even in the dark, she could see the twinkle in his eyes. _

"_Ryan! What are you doing on this side of town?" she asked, excited to see someone new. _

"_I'm just going over to Liz's house, you remember where Liz stays at, right?"_

_She nodded, "oh God, Lizard!" Hermione laughed at the fond nickname for her old friend. "Of course I remember where she stays at! I was near her house just a couple of days ago." Ryan chuckled. _

"_Yeah, we're dating…have been for a couple of months now. I'm sure she'd love to see you. I'm just going round to see her. Wanna come with?" he asked. Hermione's smile faltered a bit. She had to get home before Eric started calling her. She had left her cell phone home by accident and she was afraid that he had been calling._

"_Er…" she shifted. "I really can't, not today. I have someone to see actually," she said softly._

_Ryan grinned, "Ah! Hermione…snagged yourself a lover-boy, eh?" he laughed and she nodded curtly. _

"_Yeah, yeah…summer love is in the air," she said blandly. _

_He nodded, "well, at least let me give you a ride home, it's bloody dark out here! Hop in!" he said. Hermione went around the car. It was getting late. She appreciated the ride home. _

"_So how's school?" he asked once she got into the car._

"_It's great. I really can't wait until this year starts off, it'll be my last." She never told any of her old friends about what type of school Hogwarts was. They thought she went a Boarding school in Scotland that was a simple, intense, boarding school. "How's school with you?"_

"_Ah, you know, it's kicking my arse. Last year for me too," he said, tossing her a smile. "So who's this boyfriend of yours?"_

"_Oh…his name is Eric."_

"_Is it serious?"_

_She smiled outwardly but on the inside her stomach turned. "Yeah, it's pretty serious."_

"_Aw, my little Hermione is all grown up!" he cried out. "Oh, how they grow so fast!" She giggled at his theatrics and shrugged. They were pulling up to her house now. Ryan turned off the engine and turned to her. "So when are we going to hang out, eh? Me, you, Liz, Alec and Ralph…like old times," he said. Hermione smiled._

"_Any time, just give me a call! You guys never call me…" she gave a fake pout._

"_We DO call you! You just don't pick up," he said in mock anger. She tilted her head to the side._

"_Yeah, I'm sort of wonky with the phone. I'm not used to carrying around a cell phone and such," she said. He shrugged. _

"_It's okay, but try to pick up. Maybe we can all go to that club that just opened in London, I heard it's great, and I know everyone would love to see you and such."_

"_I will. Well, I guess I'll get going. Thank you so much for the ride, I was coming back from the library and was sort of dreading the trek back home," she said. He laughed._

"_Ah, still a bookworm, I see," he said, earning a playful swat from her on his arm. He pulled her into a giant bear hug. As she pulled away, she felt the door to the car open and someone yanking her out of the car._

"_What the fuck do you think you're doing?" shouted a voice. Hermione cringed. It was Eric._

"_N-n-nothing! Eric—this is my friend!" Her words were drowned out by Ryan's own shouting._

"_Hey, what the bleeding fuck is your problem?" Ryan said, noticing the fear on Hermione's face in the stream of street light. Eric growled. _

"_Who are you?"_

"_I'm just a friend of Hermione's, I was giving her a lift home, what are you? Her dad?"_

"_No you bastard, I'm her boyfriend! Stay away from her if you know what's good for you!"_

"_ERIC!" she shouted. "THAT'S ENOUGH! He's just a friend of mine, you have no right to be a prat—" she regretted the words later, Eric had grabbed her arm, squeezing it tightly._

"_C'mon love," he gritted through his teeth sweetly. "I've been calling you all day…"_

_Hermione flinched but replaced her pain with a fake smile._

"_Ryan, thank you for the ride home…" she turned to Eric, "I'm sorry love for not having my phone on me, you must've been so worried, it's so late and such," she said sweetly, putting on a show. Eric softened a bit and smiled. _

"_It's okay, I was just worried."_

"_Are you going to be okay Hermione?" Ryan asked before starting up his engine._

"_Oh yeah, I'm fine…thank you so much for the ride!"_

"_All right." He looked uncertain. Hermione pleaded that he wouldn't say anything further, that he would just drive off, but he didn't. "I'll give you a call later or something, so we can figure a date, okay?" She nodded, the blood rushing out of her face. Eric had become incredibly still beside her. "Bye!" he said, driving off. _

_They stood there until he turned the corner. It was then that Eric pulled her along with him, into his relatives house, the lights off. His relatives must've been out. As soon as the door closed from behind them, he punched her square across the face, making her fall onto the ground. She screamed at the blow. _

"_Are you fucking him?"_

"_No!" she cried. "I swear I'm not Eric…" _

_He walked around her crumpled form, anger on his face. "You're a fucking slut. I can't trust you at all…I don't even know who you are anymore. Do you see what you make me do to you, Hermione? DO YOU? DO YOU SEE WHY I HAVE TO TREAT YOU THIS WAY? LIKE A SLUT?" he shouted. She began to cry into her hands, her face throbbing. _

"_I'm sorry!"_

"_You're fucking pathetic," he hissed. "You're nothing! NOTHING without me, do you understand?" she nodded. He grabbed her up and slammed her against the front door. He didn't wait for her to get her wits in order, he had her right against the door._

_-_

_She gingerly touched her bleeding lip, the blood glistening on her fingers as she sat in her bedroom in front of her vanity. She rubbed the blood between her index finger and her thumb, her eyes focused on the red liquid. It was becoming cold. In front of her was her cell phone, the phone lighting up and announcing that her friend Liz was calling. She closed her eyes and sighed deeply. Reaching for the phone, she ignored the call and turned the device off, the phone making a sad little noise as it turned off. _

-

She was back. She was still standing in the common room, but her mind was back, back inside her body. She regained focus on the person standing in front of her. He was pale as ever, his eyes wide with shock as he looked at her. Watched her.

"Are you happy?" she whispered. "Are you done raping me, Malfoy?" she said coldly.

He spluttered. "What?"

"Do you think you're any better than him?" she hissed. "Do you think what you're doing to me isn't similar to what he did to me? Taking advantage of my mind?" She shook her head, breaking eye contact with him. She stared at the ground, her head spinning. "Why do this? Every time you invade my mind, I relive these experiences…these horrific experiences that I try so hard to escape!" she cried. "I hate you…I hate you so much…" she stepped around him and threw open her door, running up the spiral steps to her room.

Throwing her door open, she swung herself into her bathroom, her knees colliding heavily onto the tile floor, her knees bruising upon impact. Immediately her gut jumped and she began to vomit, the bile rising up her throat in such a harsh, burning way. She threw up until she was panting with exhaustion. Resting her elbows on the bowl, she pushed her hair back, her body trembling as she closed her eyes and saw nothing but her boyfriend, struggling under her hands as she pressed down on his face. She gripped her hair back, her face stretching as her world began to spin so fast she could barely breathe. She removed herself from the toilet bowl, standing haphazardly to her feet as she stood before the sink, rinsing her mouth with water and mouthwash to get rid of the stench and taste. She splashed water onto her face but couldn't erode the heart pumping feeling that had grabbed a hold of her. Sitting softly onto her bum and against a wall, pulling her legs up to her chest, she could feel tears pushing against her eyelids, but fought to keep them at bay. She tried taking steady breaths of air into her lungs, still not over the spasms wrecking her body. She kept her eyes closed, her mind twisting in revulsion at her memories.

There was a knock at her bathroom door and her eyes flew open. "GO AWAY!" she said, her voice raw and raspy.

"Granger…let me explain myself," he said from the door. She didn't bother to turn her head to look at him.

"Just get the _fuck _out of my room, you filthy bastard!" she shouted. She prayed that he would just walk away from her, but he entered the bathroom with her, shutting the door behind him and locking it manually. Hermione began to panic. That was the only way out. She swallowed though, not wanting to fall head first into her fear. She wanted to stay afloat in this situation—whatever it would turn into.

He sat in front of her.

They stared at each other for a while.

She was shocked out of her skull when Malfoy began tearing up, his hands covering his face as it became red and blotchy. Her body had ceased in its shaking as she took in his sobs.

"I—I don't know what's wrong with me," he gasped. "I'm…I'm…"

"You don't have to say it," she interrupted him, her voice above a mere whisper. "You don't have to say it because you will never truly mean it." He looked up at that.

"I mean it with every bone in my body, Granger." Her breath caught in her throat at the look her gave her. So full of regret.

"I just want to know why—why? Why? WHY?" she cried out finally, covering her face with her hands. "Why?" it was then that she began to cry fully, her sobs soft but steadily growing louder. "What did I do to you?" she asked between her tears. "What have I done to you for you to punish me?"

She didn't notice that she was tightly wrapped in Draco's arms. She didn't notice that he had pulled her to him, cradling her in his arms. Her memories were haunting, deadly, even. What did that mean through the eyes of a stranger? Did he really mean what he had said on that tower so long ago?

Could she run from her mistakes? Could he run from his own mistakes? Was his mistake really her?

She turned her face into his chest, the area becoming damp fast. She held onto him, her breathing slowing down, her brain catching up. She lifted her head to look at him and realized that he was looking at her.

Tentatively, their lips met. It was cold, distant, and hard. It tasted horrible—bitter and disgusting. But something, just a sliver of something, was innocent. Was completely bare of such disgust, and they drank from it. His hands found their way to her hair as the kiss deepened. She began to pull away, but he held her close. Her eyes fluttered close and opened rapidly, focusing in on the blur that was Malfoy's face. His hands were on her hips now, his nails digging into her clothes, so hard she could feel them on her flesh. Again, she tried to pull away but every time he would pull her in again, holding her fast as the kiss became passionate and angry. She clenched his upper arms, the muscles in her hands contracting at the tight grip. She felt herself being pushed onto her back. She was on her back now, Malfoy on top of her as he slid his hands down her leg, hooking it about his waist as he moved to kiss her neck, worshipping the pale skin there. She released a small whimper and removed her hands from his body, placing them between their bodies as she tried to push him off of her.

"No…" she said. He pulled back, a dazed look on his face.

He got off of her completely, a look of shame etched onto his face. She remembered something, when he had come into her room, finding her shaking from a nightmare such a time ago. She remembered how he held her. She remembered how…she remembered… "I want to forget," she said simply. "I want to forget what happened to me. I just want to move on. I want to forget what I did," her voice cracked as she looked at her hands. "I just want to live. I want to live."

They stayed in that bathroom. Hermione curled up into a ball, her head resting on her arms, tears falling down her face until she fell asleep. Draco stayed there, watching her, until he too, fell asleep beside her. Their hands met during the night, clasped tightly together.

Draco woke first, watching her for awhile until he decided to carefully lift her and put her to bed. After he had tucked her in, he wrote a short letter and placed it onto the pillow next to her. She would wake much later, read it, and go in search for him. Her heart filled with hope.

* * *

**DIVORCE** will be update within the next couple of weeks. Please R/R this chapter. Thank you.


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